__________________

Hello me. And you. Time to wake up to the reality that I actually have readers now. But whatever really, if you've found your way here it pretty much means that I don't mind(;

This means you yanhong qwendy mel keenan. Lol. Hey. A 4 man readership is a good nice number yo.

So yesterday was a pretty good day. Was supposed to come at 7 but overslept and hit school at 11. Handed in my radio capsule which i still think fails, bombed my speechcomm speech, talked to a few cool people, hung out with ________ for awhile. And no, no more details will be forthcoming today before I give myself away.

Lol.

Yes I bombed speechcomm. Bet you never saw that coming. I certainly never did. I prepared for it too. I've never prepped for a single speech in my life, I've always winged them and gotten away with them, exceedingly well, in fact. Something about a structure and pre-ordained points just throws me off and leaves me forgetting everything.

Which was pretty much what happened yesterday. Huge shocker. Talked to Cordelia afters about it and if nothing else, at least I left her with a good impression of me. Mmpph. Huge shocker there. I mean, its a tad egoistical, but I'm Keann. You know. The speech-doer. The motormouth. The you-can't-shut-me-up I always have something to say guy. And this guy froze on an assessed speech.

A good thing I suppose, I've talked with various people how my philosophy of last minute desperate but really good work is going to inevitably screw me up some day. Never expected it to be speechcomm though. But yeah, probably a good thing, waking me up from my complacency and all that. Just going to have to kick major butt for the next speech then.

Watch this space.




Went to work right afters, tried out taking the straight bus 75 all the way to marina square, and its just wrong. No bloody bus ride to town from bukit timah should take an hour. Wtf. Fail. Major fail. And I thought the 25 minute bus ride home from there on the circling 195 was bad. The hell.

*Needs to bring book*

Work was good, by the way. Was host, which pretty much means standing at the door and smiling and bringing them in. A really good time for revising something like socpsych in my head or something. Except I don't have anything substantial about it in my head at the mo. Which is fail cause I actually do find socpsych really really interesting.

*muses*

*Determines to do some really good reading*

*Somewhere in there where I want to run, get fitter, pick up a couple of kickass songs on the piano or something*

:/


It turns out that for her paper two math Sherlyn was really helped by God and a lot more composed than her previous one. Praise Him. Its so heartwarming and heartening to hear/read about stories like that- it only does go to show that interceding prayer can does and will help. Without fail(:

Show me more wonderful mysteries of Yours, Lord (:

Yesterday was a relatively good day for me and _______, I think. Got her to open up some, managed to start a dialogue, made a bad joke, got something to tease her about, and ended the conversation on my own terms.

"Cheerios"

*snort*

Just taking it as it goes, then. I really do want to be there for her and make her laugh/happy/etc. when she's swamped with stressy stuff, like now. Once I've managed to show her that I can do that for her, the battle's half won already.

:/

Be with me, Lord(: I'm not half as worried that it won't work out because I know no matter what happens, You're there for me and all that(:

Sentosa camp is this weekend.I really should start working out some so I don't look retarded at camp. Yes, I am semi-concerned about how I'm going to look with my shirt off. Yes, its retarded. Yes, you're probably dying of laughter right now. I don't care. My blog, my thoughts, my terms.

<3

Drifting a bit from Marv and the rest now. Don't care. I want to study. I want to do well. Its just too bad if our paths differ, I won't let anybody slow me down. Even if it is Marv/Pat and all those other funny awesome people.

Hey people drift, its life. I gotta go my own way at some point. Harsh, but its the only way to live.

Talked to Yanhong a bit last night. I'm sorry I can't tell you who ______ is yet! :p

You might die of laughter and I might die of humiliation if it doesn't come off well. I'll let you in as soon as I can (:

I'll see you later, alright, you cheer up as well. The hell. There're still truckloads of people here that really really care about you, even if they don't say it all the time. And I care. (:

Had a loooooong convo with Keenan last night regarding the oh-so-good food at CA(changing appetities) and how their ice cream was horribly overpriced in comparision to Cold Rock, which already is horribly overpriced. 12.90 for 2 scoops of CoK ice cream with Oreos over it and on it. That's crap. 22.90 for what they call the Godfather which is really just 5 scoops of ice cream and various oreo/peach topppings. It looks really impressive, until you remember that a Large size(4 scoops) cup of very well mixed ice cream is 8.00 bucks with GST included, and the 14 scoop take home pack is what, 16 dollars?

Ripoffripoffripoffripoff.

Its also really interesting how only the bosses are allowed behind the bar making all the desserts milkshakes and drinks and everything. Its like they have all these closely guarded recipes, where at Cold Rock everyone would HAVE to know EVERYTHING. I probably scoop ice cream better than them by default. Lol.

*toys with idea of introducing mixing ice cream to CA*

*ditches idea due to possible threats of getting sued*

May is probably just waiting for the chance to jump on my ass. Lol.

So yeah. Talked to Keenan more about _______, 3 hour convo, ended up being too tired to listen to the radio's late night show/read up on socpsych/start socpsych journal. Not healthy. I mean, our conversations are cool, but I really should have used the time spent in coherency to get some work done. Yeah. Gotta cut down on these.

Semi-big day but very slow in comparison to my usuals ahead! I'll actually be home early aka 8 plus tonight. (:/) Sweet. I can get some work then then.

In hindsight I should probably stop stuffing my days with activities all the way till 11.30- 12+ etc.

And this even with clubbing being a total non-factor in my life.

*muses*









Can you imagine how screwed I would be if _________ somehow stumbled upon this blog? She'd know exactly what I've been talking about for the whole past week, and I'd be owned so hard.

Or she might ask me out.

HEY I'M BEING OBJECTIVE, KAY.


k. Should stop blogging now. Should start being productive. Later

Quiet time was good today(:

Hmmmm

I've decided that my confusion over QT and just treating it like prayer item time is due to a lack of substantial devotion material and a guide and such. I gotta go get one of those.

Okay school now! Later!

Geegeep

I've always thought that titles should be the first thing that come to mind. Don't ask, lol. dsafasgddg.

So yesterday was a pretty good day. Was asleep half of some lectures, but I pre-empted that so I studied beforehand :D So grateful for sheereen for those notes man. I really have to do uberly well with help like that.

Is it just me or has Marvin been a little bit cold lately. He's probably just feeling a bit out of it. Meh. It'll blow over.

So yesterday i stuck to my promise to do my own thing, so I went to the gym and got my orientation in about all of 5 minutes (:o), then doubled back and stuck at the convention centre churning out the minute capsule thing. Bumped into _______ there, and then it got interesting. In a bad way.

:/

What. She got a bit pissed for no reason so I walked away. And then she called me back to take the thing we were arguing about. Huh. We hung around at two tables doing our own stuff. And then she left without saying bye after an hour.

Maybe she wanted me to say bye first.

Or she could just not care. Aye.

*blink*


I need a study partner. Some one I can bounce off and discuss socpsych theories with, and writcomm rules, among other things.

Except no one cares about studying so hard right now at this moment :/

Guess I'll just have to try then. 3.8 gpa. I'm not letting it go.

First things first I have to churn out my speech for later or i'll lose 10% just like that. D=

Busy day ahead, MD recording too, and I wanna work on my socpsych journal man. I won't have time at night cause of work again. Which for some inexplicable reason is really tiring.

I dropped dead last night after promising myself to only take a "2 minute rest"

D=

missed quiet time, and listening to the late night show which I really need to do to finish my radio report.

Which I am in extreme danger of going over word limit. I have like 27 words left of space to use. D=


So work was fun. I remembered mostly everything, and the cook is SO MUCH FRIENDLIER HAHA. She used to be this crabby smoky old lady that would raise hell if you asked her to repeat the order. Now she's so much happier, and her food still smells so good(:

I was stuck washing again for the most part =___+

Bah well. BUT THE PAY SYSTEM IS BETTER. I thought it was still 4.50 an hour man. Now its 5 an hour for weeknights, and 7-8 bucks for weekendnights! Like wow. XD

They really need people though, it seems, Irene( the boss) had to call down Anna to help out for 2 hours due to manpower shortage. Gee, familiar much. Lol.

Still not commenting on the Anna angle. Suffice to say that it was a bit weird at first, but we worked it out, we have an understanding, and she's still the amazing girl I fell in (bad) love with.

She called me "Keann" even though I never told her my name was such. :o

I'll...stop talking about her now. This would be prudent. I'd love to, but I might never stop and its a very slippery slope to walk down.


I missed prayer meeting today ):

I really wanted to hit it too. Gah. Fell asleep so fast I couldnt even turn on my phone, let alone my alarms. :/ I actually woke up at 6.42, but for a meeting at 7 that's going to last under an hour, its unsalvageable. :/

And...that brings us to now! Gotta wrap up quiet time right after this ( I always get distracted and start thinking about other stuff/fall asleep while thinking about other stuff which waswhatjusthappened)


I was for a moment ago really grateful that God gave me so many people around school that cared about me and would hang with me to do stupid stuff, just a bit put out by the fact that none of them happened to be in my semester. :/

Seniors I've got, fsv people, dvfx, sports camp, random people around school and hockey.

But my sem? Maybe God is trying to push me to hang with my class more.

*muses*

Well I'll see them later so..

This is starting to feel all too familiar to River Valley where I knew everyone but was close to no one. And especially not my class.

Don't let that happen again Lord, I don't know what I've been doing that always makes things turn out this way but I recognise that its something I've been doing and that's a start. Guide me to be a better person.

(:

God bless all the O level people especially Sherlyn! And my cellmates(:

Food/QT/homework/school/work time. Later

(:

Lolwut New Shoes Clingy Father New Job and Impending Nightwalk

In essence, that is it. I just managed to get myself into another insane middle of the night thing. Scare myself silly. All of that. Yeah.

Aside from that, today was a really good day yo. Hanging out with Mark was cool, we haven't seen each other for too long. Hopefully we can do it again next sunday. Barring FMSA camp. We'll see how it goes. Its a shame mag and adora couldn't come down. Miss those two as well yoar. Ah well. Next week (;

Got my shoes a size too big, but screw that, they're good. Then I lost my old shoes on the bus or something D=

I have to stop leaving random things behind.

*muses*

Got my job back. Lol. Irene and David don't seem to remember me quitting the MIA way, so its all good. Starting tomorrow. Again [rollseyes]

Should be interesting. No I will not comment on the Anna angle.

Tried to get ______to lunch today, which failed. Stupid workaholic responsible girl. Or maybe she just doesn't like me.

..
..

Point.

At any rate she'll have to call me tomorrow at some time so I'll just go with it then.

I hope they let us do the gym orientation on the spot in the afternoon :/ I can't stay for the night one, work and all. Woohoo.

Did my radio report! Almost anyway, I'll come back tomorrow night to listen to that Mutton Midnight Madness thing so I can wrap it up. Now I just have the podcast/capsule to finish up.

Which fails ): Its Akon. Gah. Lord give me inspiration or something. ):

IAC could potentially be a huge bitch, or an instant A. Working with Elkee is really fun though, lol@ Emo Monitoring Organization Singapore ( EMOS) XD

Hope I can keep it up.

Help me hit the ground running and keep going all the way till my 3.8, Lord. Only You can help me(:

Oh thanks mel for tagging and your take on the whole God/clubbing/loved thing! You're amazing mel, thanks a million :D

*gasp* I'm getting readers. This could potentially be good or bad.

:/

:/

-whatever.

HAHA.

okay yeah. Gonna head to nightwalk now and stay over in school or something till lectures tomorrow. Then work afters. My bag is frigging stuffed, aye.

Yes, I know I'm insane. I hope I get to do my quiet time tonight, I have a huge sermon to work through(:

Be with me Lord.

Night !

:D :D :D

The ironytrain

Attempt to make blogging regular even though i'm abit rushed for time this morning, before my memories all slip away.


Whoa. Like whoa. I thought I had stuff to blog about last night. This morning was crazy. And its only 10 am. What the hell.

Anna got a job at changing appetites.

..
..
..


This is fail. This is made more fail by my near instant decision to go back there. I can't believe myself. Still, it'd be an awesome opportunity to make things right. Maybe get to ask questions. Maybe stop avoiding each other and pretending each other didn't exist. That would be nice.

Aside from that, the food there is good, the pay is weekly, and I already know everything there is to know about the job. Hey, why not, I need the money anyway :/

Sometimes I wonder me getting hit by the ironytrain every so often has something to do with clearly retarded decisions like these.

So therefore I will be going out with Mark now, do something about my shoes, head to Marina later, and fit in my radio report somewhere in there.

It's interesting how listeners of 987 place so much emphasis on needing the djs to be funny.
<-- info taken from my (much younger) sister.

*muses*

And here's the second ironytrain.

_______ uses facebook.

..
..

This does not mean i will use facebook. Alright. Not happening. I refuse to capitulate to Keenan's misinformed predictions.

Even if they've been wellinformed up till now ):


Mmmmph. Need to do quiet time in a while. Uh. Mark is going to be soooooo pissed at me. Lol.



Last night's service was so good. I mean, the message itself wasn't really what I had been looking for, but it was good and Pastor Cynthia is insanely funny. We need to have more lecturers like those.

The best thing about the service was that I broke down during worship. Like, started crying really hard. I didn't stop me. I welcomed it. So much emotional shit that happened in the week that I hadn't been able to cry about due to circumstance/place/time/maturity etc, and I think I needed the outlet to have a really good cry, kneeling there in the dark, just me and God.

Your house is the only place where I can truly let go and be safe Lord, vulnerable but safe because You're firmly all around me(:

*happy*


I was supposed to get my shoes yesterday, but Cheryl asked me and keenan for cell dinner at holland v with those heartmelting slightly unsure but oh-so-cute eyes and I couldn't say no):

I fail at saying no to a pretty girl.

This is a problem.

aefgjlfkdfvnkdsvnasdcasndc;adsmckalgwrlhjkfw/dsa

sdafasdf.
as'dascasdfljh

):



Then dinner was so boring, it could have just been me and keenan having dinner at a table a little bit away from them not knowing who they were. Bit disappointing really. I hoped they would include him more.

Keenan noted it would take time though, this was only the 3rd week since they met him.

:/

Kinda frustrating though, how are you supposed to convince him our cell is so much more fun than the NP cell when you ignore him like that. Mmmph.

On that note, Pastor Josh is really insistent on getting Keenan to join the NP cell. Lol. Its too funny, they way he keeps insisting that Keenan meet xxxxx NP people, cerise, etc, when I've been trying to tell him Keenan met them already :/

I suspect he doesn't trust me not to try and claw Keenan to my cell :p

Sigh.


Bit saddening really. I worry for my cell. I know its O's now and all, but we hardly hang out and so many people are leaving us for other cells. Ryan and Joseph (D=) were our latest casulties, yesterday. I really want our cell to work, Lord. Bring us together again. D=


And then Keenan went to Cold Rock. Got ice cream. I abandoned him reaaal quick and went to the bus stop on my own, only to head back to Cold Rock in defeat when I found out Cheryl had already caught her bus. D=

I'm a hopeless sucker, I know. Shut up.

Went back, found Mel and Paul at Cold Rock, bit freaked out because it totally wasnt preplanned, but yeah. Good to catch up with them. This resulted in hilarious running and hiding from May, toilets and walls and all that. Lol.

In the end I apologised, anyway. Had to do it three times, even. Mmmph. But it was good, I guess. Now I don't have to avoid the place like hell anymore. XD


Joshua came round yo. I wasn't all that surprised, really :p

Paul mentioned that the other Joshua(Tan) didn't like me. Bit discouraging. I mean, I know, but I'm trying to change that now. I just hope that that comment came from a long time ago, when I was still being a dickhead as opposed to now where I'm trying to fix things. Help me, Lord, it's not right that two Christians are feuding like we are.

(:


Go for it, Joshua. Why the hell not. Lol.




________ talked to me again on msn last night. But like, for admin stuff. Again. I really have no clue whether she remotely likes me/finds me interesting or not. Chances are probably not. Ah well. Just taking it as it goes.

LORD DON'T LET THE GYM ORIENTATION THING BOMB TOMORROW. D=
plus ______'ll be there. ..


I know, I know, I'm a sad hopeless bugger. Shut up. Go away. Mmmmph.


Okay quiet time now, and then off to this potentially disastrous day. :blink:

Later.

:o

In much cheerier hindsight, I don't need a party that bad after all.





Still, a movie would be nice.



I need more happy songs.

I know You're only looking out for me, Lord, but it would be nice to be let out to party once in a while.

That probably is a badly comma spliced sentence. Past caring at this point. I'm going to writcomm hell, aren't i D=


So yeah. Everyone is going to halloween parties and I haven't been asked to a single one.

It shouldn't bother me, but it does. I'm been comforting myself with all these "I won't actively go looking for parties but maybe I'll go if people really want me to be there" thoughts. Like, totally assuming people think i'm this really fun guy that they really want at parties so i can do this whole diva "oh sorry, I don't party" thing.

So arrogant. Jeez.

Still not going to look for any. Why should i. So many implications come with the whole "omg i have to party give me a party i'll find a party" attitude that I really don't want to go there. Again.

I'll just sit here hoping that people remember me.





Yeah right.

Maybe they think I'm already at parties of my own--> which is the totally egoistic way of looking at it.

Or maybe they don't think I'm fun enough anymore.

Or maybe they think I'll refuse, doing the whole Christian thing and all--> I weirdly enough find this one really hard to comprehend. I don't know why. Maybe I'm in denial again.

The worst part is that I shouldn't be caring. Who cares about popularity anyway and sociability. I have God. He is my life. Church rules. There is an awesome bunch of people I love in church.

But i do care. At least a little bit. I like being relevant, I like being significant, I like being noticed and I like being loved.

):

Is that wrong? I don't know. Or maybe I do. Not thinking about it now. Just want to head to church and see how it goes from there.

And I like dancing. A lot. I don't let it show, but I do really love the whole thingashimmy. Why do you think I buy into mass dances so much. Just because I'm hyper? Yeah, right. I love dancing. I love grooving to the music. I love bidaboopbeeping to the beat, and I love the whole impulsive freestyling element of it all.

Cept I'm too shy to let it show. No, really.

Nevermind. But I wonder sometimes if its so wrong to want to club. Sherlyn is going today. Nat probably is. I'm going to head to church and then home like some social loser.

And the worst part is that I'm not supposed to feel that way. I should be over the moon about church. Don't get me wrong, I really am. It's just the whole going-home-after-that part that leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth.


Not many people to ask about this. Maybe i'll talk to josh. Or nat. Or something. Draw me close to You, Lord (:

Because I don't think there's anyone else who will.

Busted, T-rex roars, cell leaders, and i need new shoes.

Don't think I wanna know you
I'm tired of running after you
I won't send you sorry cards
Cos I don't need to
I'm giving up and I'll never reminisce
I've found a way, I'm getting over this
I let go in every way
Cos I don't need you



Busted, Can't Get Thru


Crazy awesome song. No i'm not doing the whole sensitive emotionally hurt guy thing again, I just really like the song. You have to hear it to understand. That whole wounded confused desperate hurting mood set over the whole song is something i can really identify with, that's all. There isn't a person in my life right now that remotely fits those lyrics.

Probably that Anna thing again. But c'mon, that was ages ago :rollseyes:

(:


Songs like that don't make me sad, they actually cheer me up cause I just start feeling good that i broke out of that whole pain cycle. I made it out. I'm clear (:


Soz. Uh. Stomachache, now. Don't think i'll stay online long, gotta go upstairs to take a shit. Plus i noticed _____ going offline just as i came on. So much for that (maybe she'll talk to me idea) yeah. Hah. *meh* :/

okaytosumitupbecausemystomachisgoingonyouneedtotakeashitnowstrike im just going to sum up today really quick.

Hair fails.

Spent more money out of my shoe fund):

Procured the t-rex sounds, tons of them, found the snazzy brassy iconic horn solo from the jurassic park soundtrack that is just so old school classic verving win. :D

Cheryl called and Joseph messaged me to make sure that I wouldn't be stranded at corporate prayer cause no one from my cell could make it, that was really nice. Even if I didn't really need it :rollseyes: I'm not THAT low-profile, and God would provide anyhow (: He always does. Haha.

This leads me to possibly thinking about Cheryl again. Hmm. *slaps self*

*muses*

Hope she's having fun at prom. :o ............. I fail. ....
...
...


STOP IT KEANN.

Uh. Alright. Need new shoes. Must buy tomorrow before i spend more money out of fund for food. But i'm this really perpetual hungry person ):








Church was awesome. Crazily so. Like wow. Here I am to worship, Lord (:

OKAY NIGHT

Hippiegee

Some of these days im just so grateful that i kept this blog low key. Specially looking at my last entry. Nobody knows(:



Its friday! :D :D

Church in..8 hours yoar. Lord keep me strong(:

It kinda sucks that joseph nor cheryl will be there though, and i have this bad feeling that hardly anyone will show up, O levels and apprehension and all :/

Idon'tcarecauseiloveYouLord

(;

Stayed over at joshua's place last night, just one of those random things, and yeah we talked about stuff. Seems like he thinks that apache vid we did was really good :o

It means a lot coming from a film connoisseur like him, aye.

Encouraging stuff.

Anyway, we talked about loads of stuff, i found it really interesting finding out how people saw me back then in popularity phase, and how people see me now. Like the whole "oh he's changed, wow, Praise the Lord" and all that.

I didn't think that people took so much notice, and cared/talked about me like that. :o

I suppose this just means having greater responsibility to walk in Your ways and live a life You'd be proud of, Lord(:

Draw me near and never let me go, aye.

Besides that, i got hit by the ironytrain again, lol@mel. Never saw that one coming. Like whoa.



Have to do the video sound thing soon! Like really soon! like today! I garagebanded the sounds i needed already, i just have to sit myself down to do all of it and make it all spiffy like. Dear me. It seems like i'm losing my motivation again. Help me stay strong, Lord, help me be responsible, and also continue to be a good ic and all that aye (:

Rawr. And after that ITS CHURCH.

:D :D :D :D :D :D

I still have yet to do my radio report. And uh. That akon podcast thingy. Huh. Oh yeah. Radio class today was alright, better than i'd thought it be. It is frigging hard to go on and on. No wait that's easy. Its keeping it in the topic (aka covering onsite thingy) that's hard. Ugh.

Still, when played back, my voice didn't sound as bad as I'd thought it'd be! It actually kinda sounded like it belonged there. Cool. Very encouraging, thank You Lord, haha.

I think He wanted to show me that I still have a lot to learn for radio. About everything. I just hope I can live up to His faith in me. Gotta persevere! Gotta work hard! I can't allow myself to slip! D=

Re-motivate me for work, Lord. Aye(:

Mmmm. I think I bombed the newspaper writing stint. Put it off too long and now i'm too busy to do anything about it. Should have worked harder, there ):

Rawr. Life is okay, I suppose, IwantchurchandshoutingoutmyheartsingingtoYouLord(:

Soon. Hold me in Your arms(:

I haven't done anything about the ___________ girl today. Just taking it as it goes. Don't much know what else to do anyway. Give me opportunities Lord? Mmmph. Maybe I'll do nothing in the hopes that she'll talk to me. Do that whole "make them come to you" thing. :/

*moves on*

Haha alright later, me. Time to go do me-time stuff. Maybe make keenan come down. Idk.

cause no one manages to confuse me like you do

Turns out that the subtle meanings weren't quite so intended after all.

I found out when she messaged me regarding some admin stuff, and i replied rather coldly, leading to a huge apology from her, which i accepted.

"We're cool, right?"

"Yes girl [wry grin]"

And she never talked to me again after that.

:blink:

I swear, the mixed signals are killing me. And i'm so afraid of heading into Friend Zone with this one, because I never ever want to find myself back there again.

And no i'm not revealing no bloody names even though i'm aiming for near-zero readership because i know you bloody socialstalkers are out there.

Maybe i'm in over my head, don'cha think.


I feel relatively better regarding hockey now. Prayer helped( I swear I need to find a Job-bible guide, i felt compelled to go read that just now, and i realised that i was really lost in all the unfamiliar dialogue in there. Hmm.

I so want friday to roll around, Lord I miss church and prayer and singing my heart out to you where nobody cares about self-consciousness and its all so uncomplicated.

And He doesn't randomly throw around mixed signals.

*muses*


I still can't decide between Gold 90.5 or 987 for my radio report.
[huh]
:/

From hero to zero in about two seconds flat

Patrick was right. I would, and did, beat myself up.

It amazes me how i'm the daftest guy in the world when it comes to only seeing things that i want to see.


And today started out so promisingly too.

I don't have much time to wax lyrical about it, methinks. Once my internet dies i'm going to go downstairs and emo some. Run myself silly. Bash hockey balls into the wall till my arms are sprained. It isn't as if i'll be using them for anything important anytime soon.

So much for breaking into the team.

Thinking about it now its kinda silly how hard it hit me a while ago. But that's me. I'm so horribly emotionally vulnerable. And today was the first time in a really long time that i had to force myself to smile and be hyper and all of that.

Bury it deep, and run the hell away~


So today was alright. Hit jurassic park. Wore my horribly huge new clothes and no i'm not buying into the hip hop look. -______-

And even if i am it's still preferable to the emo skinny jeans huge heavy belt fad.

Aye.

Bumped into hockeyers later in the day, and later Patrick. It was nice hanging out with him again. We hardly see each other around anymore.

He still is about the sharpest guy i know, though.

"Yeah i got your message, did you get mine?"

I never picked up on that, kudos to the guy for hitting me with it.

I swear I am the most oblivious guy in the world.

And I did beat myself up over failing again, like he knew i would.

Jeez.

I just wish I had a longer recovery time in between emotional piledrivers, though.

Hockey ):

It wasn't as though i could show my disappointment there though, what the hell. Theres a team to support and all that.

Alright internetgoingodnwandallthatnightlateri'llcomeback.

Gawhoops

I forgot to put in the official announcement:(D)

KEANN'S BLOG IS ACTIVE/OPEN/ALIVE AGAIN :D :D :D

Alrighty. I'm not taking it online, by the way. I still prefer it like this. Diaryjournal no one sees :D

Except maybe yanhong. Lol. I know you're out there, seniorstalker.

:D

NIGHT.

The wunderkind.

:o Hello.

I remembered today that i had a blog when yanhong hunted me down all concerned at stuff worrying if i was okay due to very angsty emo sad etc. entry below this one.

Thanks yan for caring (:


AND YES LIFE IS GREAT

HAHA

My life totally turned around that friday i went to church, it was amazing. Job rocked, church rocked, met some great people and i've generally been having bucketloads of fun(:

I mean, i would totally talk about it but i forgot most of it. My life history now extends to Red Camp, and post-Red Camp:/

Funny how i can't remember anything much before that SL camp :D

But yeah. Really busy now. Projects i'm determined not to do last minute, hockey POLITE (rollseyes) games starting this thursday, Red Camp vid I have to edit tonight and life to live(:

(I went shopping today and totally blew my pay on clothes and a haircut. Finally)

(Now to badger my mom for shoes money. I am heavily in need. Help me Lord (: )



So yeah. Off to do stuff :D