Try walking through the halls of TTSH past midnight, its dark, sleepy, dimly lit, glowing with little puddles of yellow light, probably to reassure those who have to wait the whole night for their loved ones, and those rushing in by taxi for the A&E.
Its very calming, not creepy at all, doesn't smell sickly, or medicinally, no buzzy worried crowd, just the occasional worried couple with masks on, head in hands, waiting outside the A&E, or the sleeping old man in the bench.
This place isn't death, it's opportunity. The place breathes with them. Whether in the beds of the sleeping patients above, or the waiting worriers outside the quietly frantic A&E, or the occasional urgent gown-escorted helter-skelter metal bed trolley running past from the ambulance.
There's so much to do, so much influence to wield, especially when you remember that we're living time-bombs of God's presence spreading puddles of it when we walk, more when we pray, and even more when we offer to heal.
And its, so, fun.
I wasn't even trying to be in a hospital tonight. I just got back, an hour ago from TTSH, I didn't plan to go there for a treasure hunt or a prayer walk or anything like that.
I just had a film shoot that went past midnight on National Day, and one of the actors got greviously injured. We rushed him to the hospital.
And so I'm here, sitting here, with Valerie Chia, on the gravel outside the A&E, mask drooping off our faces, watching the other despondent and worried people waiting for loved ones.
ooh
gee God I wonder what happens now?
:D :D :D
Lets just say that I haven't been offering to step out and heal people in awhile, despite being post-SSM and all. School has been hard, challenging, and social life tempts to distract, and my struggles with self-discipline are all over the place. Revival hasn't started, its scary to offer to heal friends, politics are awash around the area, and different christians from different churches believe in slightly different things, and have slightly different priorities.
And that lady in a wheelchair has turned from a window of opportunity into an obstacle of fear all over again.
I admit that.
Saturday comes. Suddenly my friend, who doesn't believe in healing, pops up out of the blue and tells me that he believes in healing now. It wasn't the argument. It wasn't the experiences I told him about. It was a conviction from the Holy Spirit brought upon by me being entirely willing to jump out and try and heal him of an injury, a month ago.
He didn't get healed that day, by the way.
But here he is then, telling me that watching me dare to be so expectant, with such faith, changed something. He continued, talking about going out to heal in general, saying "what's needed is intervention, the healing from God is just a bonus".
"What's needed is intervention, the healing from God is just a bonus."
Now we know this. The Bethel guys told us this. But its one thing to hear it from the Bethel experts, and quite another to hear the exact same thing come out of your friend's mouth, who was previously quite unconvinced of healing, and its not like you said anything like that to him, fearing that it'd sound like an excuse for the healing not happening.
So that was encouraging. Then Pastor John comes up and gives a sermon about the exact same thing. And I am reminded that yes, I can heal, and I want to heal, and I want to expect the supernatural all over again, even though I've been flagging.
Back to the hospital past 1am.
what am I doing here
snicker.
Totally go for it right.
Rubs hands together
I'm still laughing at how I got to be here. I know I need practice, I know I haven't done this in a long time, and here I am, and I didn't even seek it out. Its the A&E ward on a public holiday in the middle of the night. This is too easy.
There's that lady in a wheelchair with casts all over, can I pray for you? Lady's very un-wheelchair-bound friend assertively proclaims "no, we don't need you to pray for us, thanks."
Ooook.
I return to my friend. Then that old man in the thin white tee and slippers. "Hi, my name is Keann, what's yours?"
"Sorry, no, I don't want to talk to you right now, I just want to rest."
old man walks away and pointedly sits somewhere else
On that note, people waiting in a hospital past midnight are usually notoriously easy to talk to. If you're there waiting for someone else too. It happens all the time, all over the world, worried waiters find solace in others waiting too, and rapport is usually easily, sometimes desperately, built over cups of vending machine coffee and hard ceramic benches.
You can see in the body language, you can feel it in the atmosphere, everyone wants a friend when waiting at 3am.
Usually.
Haha.
Its okay. I make friends with this indian man. Foreign worker I think. We stumble over some words, then he leaves when his friend comes out from the ward, I never got to offer to pray or sow a seed. Bummer.
Ooook. My friend's mom comes then. And we talk while my friend sleeps, about stuff, work, the film shoot, parent-children dynamics, whatever..
I go and buy food, come back, and see this semi-old guy sitting opposite us on a curb, next to the A&E mysterious fever ward (which is crazy fillled, at the end of the day, I've spoken to 3 out of 5 people who are waiting for people with high fevers).
His son overheated. he's in the ward. Of course we can't go in. But i get to pray for him and the father too. The father wants my contact for some reason, maybe to ask his son to thank me later. This whole time, I know my friend's non-christian mom is watching my back.
I am devious. Haha. The injured friend is discharged, I tell them to leave first cause I still want to pray for the father dude.
My only case k, of course I'm staying. Its 230am, this is hilarious.
We finish that, I start to grab my bag and leave.
Hold on.
That worried indian couple has been sitting there since before I got here, everyone else around since then has left.
Hmm. (Its always really easy to go for one more after one successfully allowed prayer)
:D
They didn't let me pray for their feverish (another one) daughter. But seeing the way their eyes lighted up at a random stranger coming to ask them who were they waiting for, what happened to her, concerned for her health and their tiredness...
That was cool(:
That's all right. Time to go! Hold on! There's this worried lady sitting near the counter! There's a man with her. But they aren't together. You can tell. The man is serious too, but he's not worried, he's resolute. Like, almost quietly confident.
"Hey, do you know where's the taxi stand? (I really didn't know). Er, who are you waiting for?"
Hee.
Turns out the lady's husband is sick. Can I pray for him?
"Oh we prayed already," the confident man says with a tired smile.
oh, it all makes sense now
:D
Now its my face's turn to light up. Hahahahha. Fellow christians. Awesome! I could have offered to pray again, more prayer always helps. Perfectly legit.
Instead, I had a gut feeling (I won't say led), to not do that, but say this instead. I was somewhat high already, anyway, from the previous two happenings in 6 minutes.
"I like hospitals. So much, opportunity :D"
Faces flicker with half-confusion before settling on sudden realisation and smiles.
"Oh, I see," the man says, happily.
I leave them. I know they've already been blessed :D
I'm not saying this to boast, but I know there is nothing wrong with accepting that we are awesome, modesty is not humility.
But I know how inspired and strengthened I am when I'm suffering and see a fellow peer suddenly jumping in and being really on fire for God, happy and bringing Him into the conversation for you. It works best when when it comes from an unexpected area, like not in church, but school from someone you didn't know was a christian, or on the train, or anything like that.
And I've just done that for that two, especially being a crazy young kid running around the hospital at 2am and all. I've inspired them, and given them something to think about.
I take my leave, skate down the TTSH slope, see a (full-fledged!) bat flitting above my head when I reach the bottom, take a cab back.
So blessed! :D :D
Thank you God, for remembering that I do best with spontaneous surprises, not planned charts and outlines :D
We are such walking time bombs for God, isn't it scarily exciting. :D
Hospitals(:
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