I cannot ever slack off at any point EVER in any project or class or meeting or lecture EVER. I have to be THE model student.
Cause I can't afford one more, anymore screwups. I'm still paying for enough mistakes I made in my first year already, I don't got no leeway. People still don't trust me, don't know how to deal with me, don't hugely want to be around me. Which really isn't how it should be around a Christian. It sucks, but its life.
Sigh. This is all for You, God. I'm trying. I desperately don't want to be a blemish to your Name ):
I wish I could be like Pris, like Cheryl, Melody, Melodie, Alene, Genny, Tab, Sam, people who are seen as well liked and capable and responsible and that's how it should be for Christians.
I mean, if you walk the talk, you shouldn't be having problems, right?
But I haven't, not last year, and definitely not on a number of occasions last sem, and I am trying, but I have a lot of negative ground to cover before I even hit neutral.
Sigh. Thin lines. But yeah, gosh ):
Cause I can't afford one more, anymore screwups. I'm still paying for enough mistakes I made in my first year already, I don't got no leeway. People still don't trust me, don't know how to deal with me, don't hugely want to be around me. Which really isn't how it should be around a Christian. It sucks, but its life.
Sigh. This is all for You, God. I'm trying. I desperately don't want to be a blemish to your Name ):
I wish I could be like Pris, like Cheryl, Melody, Melodie, Alene, Genny, Tab, Sam, people who are seen as well liked and capable and responsible and that's how it should be for Christians.
I mean, if you walk the talk, you shouldn't be having problems, right?
But I haven't, not last year, and definitely not on a number of occasions last sem, and I am trying, but I have a lot of negative ground to cover before I even hit neutral.
Sigh. Thin lines. But yeah, gosh ):
Right, I really must sleep now. Goodnight :/
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