Eh.

I'm going to try and remember birthdays. Lol.

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15th Birthday. Sec..3?


Oh I remember this one. I was in the middle of that whole Anna misery thing, which started about March 11, and ended about November..22? Idk, someplace, Phase 1, anyway. Lol.

And we were the best of friends, or at least I thought so, but she never really had time for me anymore, and whatever role I used to fill had been taken over by her boyfriend. And only being a friend, I had no claim to her time, at least I thought so, and so I just suffered in silence. And every day it cut deeper and deeper.

She forgot my birthday, that year.


Hey. I was stupid once. Get over it. I have. Lol.


But there was this other girl who had remembered my birthday. June! It was after the Marion Raven concert which I snagged two tickets at some radio thing and went with her for. We were kinda close. But when we went out, I was hitting myself all the time for comparing her to Anna and how we used to function, and pretty much thinking i was a horrible bastard. So yeah. Lol. June gave me a cd, filled with some of her favourite songs, which most turned into my favourite songs for awhile. Emo songs. Very emo rock songs. But they got me through a very very bad period of time in my life. A time in my life where I would go to church(family church) camp in September, and suddenly sink into depression and stay upstairs during Service so I could cry my heart out, blasting that favourite song of mine into my ears.

That CD lasted me 2 years man. And I would literally listen to some of of the tracks and be overcome with emotion and start tearing, whenever, whereever. That's how shot my nerves were..

(Charmaine i'm not helping things am i *wince*)

Hey. No laughing. Lol. Anyway, I kinda ruined that friendship. June still hates me now, I think. :/

Edit: Wow. I found another note. From an amazing friend. Singling! Where have you gone! Haha i vaguely know you're in SIM, and modelling now, but gosh, look what I found:


"
yo! merry xmas :) haha retarded ddd :|

hahas. eh next year got o levels hor must study!

ha. eh..wait or are yu in IP? :| ddd. :x

yups btw, thanks for being such a gr8 friend all these years

and standing up for me at times! eg the chanx thingy.

ya. haha. but hors sometimes tolerate awhile lah.

mothers are naggy haha. okay?

alrights, take care! trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding! :)


nothing i can boast in
my life is scarred with sin
my works are filthy rags
no merit can i bring

yet mercy filled Christ's heart
love took Him to the tree
its grace alone, which saves me
Christ's blood that sets me free :)



:DDDD Gosh. We were like 15. And "all these years" meant like 13-15 :s
Guess I wasn't THAT bad a person. Heh. You know, the two of us were seen as the "bad kids" of our level, in church? :s Now you tell me how ^that can be written by someone who's -

Nevermind. Haha. Good times(:
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16th birthday, sec 4 lol


I have very little idea about what happened this year, except that I had just started coming to Coos( !!! : D) about 3 weeks ago, so something good had to have happened :D


But I can't for the life of me remember what it was :/


I think Charlotte and Sophia were the only ones who cared about me, then, lol. And one of them is in Canada, and the other one...yeah hates me now. And this one I have absolutely no idea what happened. Big blowup out of nowhere. Jeez. Hands-off man. But :/


I remember Grace and Maria though. Both of them were huge in my life at the time, having been the ones who brought me to Coos and all :D


Hey. I never pretended I was an awesomely popular person in secondary school. I wasn't. I don't think I was well liked. Anything that has happened since Poly happened has been purely the grace of God. Aye. Haha. (:

-------------------------------------------


Oh gosh I remember being 14 and being sec 2 gosh.


Here's a note I found:

Dearest Qien (:/),

Knowing you has certainly made our lives more colourful.

Just like you never fail to get in trouble, you never fail to make a gloomy day bright! 2j will forever open her doors to their sunshine!

May you receive many hugs and kisses from THAT someone!

<3,
Huiyi; Maria; Tiffany; Grace. 15.8.04



Lol. Okay background information: 2J wasn't my class. 2K was my class. But I didn't like 2K very much, and thought people in 2J were so much cooler, so I hung out with them a lot (not something i'm very proud of). Yeah. And in their class, I was always running around getting in trouble for pulling tricks on people. Dumping cake in water bottles. Lizards, once-alive-now-dead ones, itching powder, whatever. And Huiyi Maria Tiff and Grace got me this..well I can't remember, but more prank stuff. Heh.

I think the gesture meant more to me than anything, since I wasn't part of their class, and I think secretly was always very scared that I didn't have acceptance.


Yeah well! So that was Sec 2! And no, i'm not telling you who the girl was. I can't remember anyway. Honest.


OH I DO REMEMBER. DAMN. BUT STILL NOT TELLING. HAHA.


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If you haven't noticed by now, notes make the greatest impressions on me. I have this messy drawer with scraps of paper inside, and when I find them I laugh so hard, and smile so much, because yeah haha. Ah well. Like for instance, I have Charmaine's and Lala's notes from Fuel-up there. And notes from Prisca, my angel, etc. And Shereen's valentine's day thing..


Eh. Okay. I think I am boring you. I will retreat. Ahahaha. K. Later.