Sunday, March 7, 2010

Facebook Archive - 30 Jan 2009

Hello, I am a Mass Communication Student from Ngee Ann Polytechnic.

As any Mass Communication student will tell you, our workload is nuts. Really crazy nuts, and we’re not just saying it. We crash from deadline to deadline, finishing one project right by the skin of our teeth and then rushing straight to the next one, some in groups and some individual. Combine this with five different heavy intensive modules, and we turn into caffeine-chugging stress maniacs trying to manage time, especially with five different deadlines that all seem to come together, and group mates who don’t always do work, and our individual poor self-discipline.

Now you would think that it is okay, because we like what we do, and we’re all very passionate media people and so our creative content production comes to us easily.

This isn’t true, because while Mass Communication is a media course, in itself there are lots of diverse areas that we have to cover, for example TV, radio, news writing, advertising, public relations and web design. And most of us only come to Mass Communication for one or two of these things, or are talented at one great thing we want to do in the future, and often have to fight to survive in certain areas we don’t understand or will probably never really understand that are taking time away from pursuing fully the projects that we do love!

For example, I’m a writer, and I love radio, but I have absolutely no head for design at all, any kind of design. Not a designer type. And some love television production, scripting, directing, casting, but absolutely hate radio or anything else! But we still have to do well in every project, or try, because everything counts towards our final grade point average.

Its like a JC or secondary school arts person wondering why the hell is he doing math, except that if that guy screws up math along the way, he can come back from it if he saves his As and Os. For us its not like that, we don’t get second chances and if we’re not talented we’re kind of screwed over. The bottom line is, it’s a very scary and demanding course.

Possibly other courses are really hard as well. And JC is surely no walk in the park. But we wouldn’t know, we don’t have the time to look around and compare notes.

Coming back to the testimony, it is the 6th of January, a Tuesday, and I have a 1000-word feature magazine story to write by the 9th of January, Friday, at 5pm. Now for this subject called Feature Writing, our grade is made up of only two stories, and the final magazine put together and a couple of very small tests. This is the second story. So it is kind of like a big deal. And I have 3 days to write it, we were given a month!

Now regarding why my story has not been done till now, it is kind of a long story, but it boils to me procrastinating –as always- and not doing my work till the last minute. Not right now, but for some projects way back when, and when you rush those, you have less time to do the impending ones, and so you have to rush those too, it is like a chain effect of doom? So I have been working very hard recently, but still paying for past mistakes. And I take full responsibility for that. Sigh.

Also, I had my story idea long ago, but God led me to change it abruptly before Transformers Camp to write about this girl who was going through a very hard time with her family. Which, when I met the girl a day after Transformers Camp to interview her, turned into a three hour conversation about God and the amazing things we did and saw at camp! So that was pretty epic. We talked about a lot of things, this girl is a very intelligent person, and she asked a lot of questions and stuff, so it was a really cool experience for me, knowing that God had led me here.

But when I wanted to start on the actual interview, God said to me “Go back and do your previous story”. And I was like “No, wait what. God you can’t just do this to me, you asked me to change the story to be about her in the first place, this can’t be right!” And God said, “The work that you came here to do has already been done.” And I was like “Oh”, kind of spazzed out and sheepish and in awe about it. I told my friend, the girl as much, because she is that cool and we can talk openly about God like that.

Even though that is really cool, it contributes to why I have no story, starting on Tuesday right after rushing yet another huge project deadline that again by God’s grace he let me finish against impossible odds after giving up time to come to Transformers Camp because He said so!

There is another problem. Ngee Ann Polytechnic’s Open House is from the 8th to 10th of January, Thursday to Saturday. And this is bad because that means if I help out, as I usually do, it means that I’ll be running tours of my school for prospective students from 10am all the way to 6pm everyday non-stop, probably skipping lunch because there really are too many visitors and I will be too busy and too tired to do anything else, or even be able to do my story.

It really is a no-brainer, though, is it! Helping out for Open House is a volunteer thing and my grades come first, I have to give up leading tours for the students and use what time I have to do my story. It is not a hard decision to make.

Except for the part where God suddenly hits me in the face on Wednesday with a “Help out for Open House” command. And I’m like “What?” *splutters incoherently* I mean, it just doesn’t make logical sense! Its not like coming for church camp, or evangelising to somebody, or being a huge bright light for somebody’s Christian walk, this is a completely secular thing that God is asking me to do.

Plus, this is different from God giving me lots of miracles in the past to complete my work past insane odds when I give up time for Him. I won’t have maybe even half-an-hour to pull a crazy story out of my ass, miraculous though that may be, I will literally be running Open House tours all the way up till and beyond the deadline of Friday, 5pm! I’m staring at a definite ten percent cut in my grade for handing in a day late past the deadline for sure, if I do this thing.

I’m not even sure if I’m hearing God correctly because I know I enjoy leading tours and working Open House a lot, tiring though it may be, and I would honestly rather do Open House and happily take my own sweet time over the weekend doing my story assuming God is in control. So it is hard to differentiate my own desires from God’s voice.

Heck, my group mates for another project also due on Friday are also worried if I’m hearing God correctly because its their grades in the equation too, you know?

But I keep asking God again and again and take His answer in faith, His reason that the people also doing Open House “will need me”, and my group mates are ultimately supportive. And yes, they are Christian, thank God.

And so I embark on Open House duties, while calling and interviewing people at night, interviewing teenagers on MSN, calling mums (because this is a family magazine article), juggling projects and by God’s grace He really gives me very good interviewees and very good quotes to use, all of them great Christian friends and most of them from Church Of Our Saviour, including the two mums I interviewed.

By Friday, 2pm, after taking a short break to take a call from my final interviewee, an expert counsellor, I have all my quotes needed for the story and I can actually attempt to churn something out by 5pm! Looking around at the crowds though, and knowing that Open House is a commitment that God wanted me to do, I went back to my duties, smiling, leading tours, the usual, up to my deadline and beyond knowing that my assignment is losing grades as we speak.

It is an interesting experience for me because God has come through for me countless times in the past when I set aside time for Him, and it always takes accepting that He might not? That my grades don’t define my future, God does, and even if He lets me score badly or fail it really ultimately is for my good and I am for the better for me. But up till now I’ve never actually had to live that consequence, He’s always been working miracles for me once I come to terms that He might not. And it is a huge growing experience living what I believe, because Open House is over three days and with that and the weekend I have plenty of time to relieve the consequences of my decision, and to be weirdly happy, and feeling myself grow stronger and more secure in God.

Well, the story takes longer to write than expected, and I actually handed it in on Monday, 5.45 pm, which means that it actually is two days late, and that means a twenty percent grade loss. But hey, right? Grimly, I set it into my tutor’s pigeonhole after time-stamping it, and walk away vaguely trusting God about it, although I’m miffed about having lost a whole twenty percent. Even if I don’t get an amazing grade I am still grown! And God has been very real to me over the past few days, so the whole thing has already been really great for me, if taxing. I feel very sick but I rush off to try and practice for a radio test that I have in two days that I haven’t done anything yet for, and that’s another huge testimony, my cell knows about it already, God really came through there too.

Today, on the 29th of January, I went to school to collect my assignment from our very very strict tutor. And I am very scared, because for my previous story I got a C, even though I thought it was great? My editor and subeditors for our magazine project seem to love my stories, but if I got a C, I can’t be that great a writer, can I…

I have the paper in my hands and I gulp while reading a red scribble at the top near my story headline saying, “Try harder”. I don’t really know what to expect and as I flip to the last page with trepidation…

It’s an A. A big fat hastily scribbled A in a big circle near the bottom of the page. And my knees buckle. Seriously wait what? I am completely in awe. Joy rushes through me with a hot silent glow as I look at the scribble in wonder. I can still write. I’m not a bad writer. I really needed to see this, to know that material that I have written has been deemed worthy by my drill-sergeant lecturer of the best grade. Well it isn’t an A+...but hey you know. Whatever works!

Thank You God right. I know. I completely know. This is nutsos.

You know what the best thing is? Despite everything that happened from Transformers Camp and Fuel School of Prayer and all that charged up fire and prayer to take the school for God, I started backsliding Friday night. It has been seven days, and I’ve been not wanting to think about it. But staring at my inexplicable, one-day written A-grade paper handed up two days late knowing it could have only been done by God’s grace and mercy and remembering all that I gave up to do what He commanded and Him rewarding me like this and remembering how dedicated I was to listening to Him back then...its really a reminder I can’t ignore.

Look at the way He chose to bring me back, not with a stick, but with a blessing! It is really funny because looking back on the past few weeks, He’s been testing me with sticks and trials while I have been strong in Him, but now that I am weak He chose to bring me back gently with a shower of blessings, when really He is completely justified in kicking me about sternly or punishing me or something.

Not an hour ago, a friend drew me a vision of me backsliding and a message from God that He would always bring me back, a vision she got yesterday, something that no one from church could have possibly known because I haven’t gone to cell and to service in a week.

God is good, He’s more than good, He’s mind-blowingly amazing and thank You God for bringing me back to You, thank You, I don’t deserve You at all!

I’m not fully back yet, but I’m on my way. I’m on track. To go back to honouring Him daily and keeping Him in the loop about my decisions daily and to go back to that mission to taking the school for Him. Slowly, but surely. Bring me back to You, God.

This 2270-word testimony is a start. Which is cool because I really haven’t been writing about the cool things that have happened in my life to me through God, and I should, because it encourages and helps others as well as helps me remember! I hope this has been a help to you.

Bring me back to You, God.


Keann, 18, Church Of Our Saviour, Singapore

29/1/09
Written over a year ago · ·
Shery Delilah Chan
Shery Delilah Chan
awesome stuff, keann! praise God!
January 30, 2009 at 1:48am ·
Khalisah Tan
Khalisah Tan
I am so completely and utterly relieved and happy for you :)
January 30, 2009 at 1:49am ·
Keann Chong
Keann Chong
haha yes praise Him. Its not me. Yay elle [:
January 30, 2009 at 1:54am ·
Shery Delilah Chan
Shery Delilah Chan
♥ go Keann.
January 30, 2009 at 1:55am ·
Ning Leow
Ning Leow
♥ (:
January 30, 2009 at 1:58am ·
Amon Wong Chong Hao
January 30, 2009 at 2:15am ·
Joel Cheng
Joel Cheng
This should be your article.
January 30, 2009 at 2:27am ·
Keenan MacKenzie
Keenan MacKenzie
♥ Valentines Day
January 30, 2009 at 5:25am ·
Inez Ho
Inez Ho
GO KEANN! :D
January 30, 2009 at 8:00am ·
Sherry Wong
Sherry Wong
yay! share it with the church ha ha. :D
January 30, 2009 at 9:40am ·
Cheryl Yeo
Cheryl Yeo
♥ ♥
January 30, 2009 at 9:45am ·
Hannah Lois Ng
January 30, 2009 at 1:44pm ·
Jarrel Tan
Jarrel Tan
feat what?
January 30, 2009 at 2:12pm ·
Charlene Ong
Charlene Ong
whoaaaa. glad to be a tiny part of the process :D
January 30, 2009 at 11:39pm ·
Charisia Ong
Charisia Ong
way to goooo! this is really really encouraging, thank you for posting this =D
January 31, 2009 at 10:55am ·

No comments: